(maybe) we're both afraid of the words we both havn't said

on.

a beautiful a day, a pretty a boy.

long bus rides for accomplishing self-deliberations, checked. the strong sense of home-coming familiarity towards hwachong is seriously overpowering. seems like i've slipped past countless opportunities for admission (nanyang dsa appeal the list goes on). if given a chance i would pay my life for a transfer into hwachong. (time to send that cheque to the principal) but then again, its not as tho ac sucks, maybe its just team hwachong. wow wee reading room's my first home yo, and reading room's air condition's my second.

i went down to the river,
i set down on the bank.
i tried to think but couldn't,
so i jumped in and sank.
i came up once and hollered!
i came up twice and cried!
if that water hadn't a-been so cold
i might've sunk and died.

but it was cold in that water! it was cold!

i took the elevator
sixteen floors above the ground.
i thought about my baby
and thought i would jump down.
i stood there and i hollered!
i stood there and i cried!
if it hadn't a-been so high
i might've jumped and died.

but it was high up there! it was high!

so since i'm still here livin',
i guess i will live on.
i could've died for love-
but for livin' i was born
though you may hear me holler,
and you may see me cry-
i'll be dogged, sweet baby,
if you gonna see me die.

life is fine! fine as wine! life is fine!

br-br-break it down now

beep beep oh look now there goes my phone
and once again i'm just hoping its a text from you
it ain't right read your messages twice thrice
four times a night its true
everyday i patiently wait
feeling like a fool but i do, anyway
nothing can feel as sweet and as real
cos i know that i wasn't waiting in vain

and maybe its true
i'm caught up on you
maybe there's a chance your stuck on me too
so maybe i'm wrong
its all in my head
maybe we're afraid of words we both haven't said

i'm always connected online
looked on my facebook all the time
hoping you've checked my profile
just can't help wondering why,
you play it cool but,
i'm hopelessly falling for you
every night on the phone i'm
in love with you, and i know you like it girl
all joking aside
let's see you and i
come out and say what we're trying to hide

Labels: hinged on everything.break

I dreamt that you were a part-time lover, but i woke up you were a full time friend.

Finally an entire undisturbed uninterrupted day for myself to appreciate the pretty green and bees and birds (uh or crows?) i seriously need more time like this for self-reflection. Was supposed yeah supposed to follow an uncompromising timetable consisting of work sit-ups food work and more work. Did i mention work??? since 7.30, that is but its past noon now and i've absolutely no recollection or what so.

I microwaved french fries, yes i'm proud! And my heart skipped a beat or rather, many beats with images of me, food, exploded oven a couple of years ago still flashing. I haven't dared to cross that 3m away from oven beep beep red line since then. Then i had to feed a sudden urge for a serious post.

Have been plunging all my time/efforts to keep up with love of the life literature and history, an 800m breakthrough, r-e-a-l-l-y-f-u-n-f-r-i-e-n-d-s but never to myself. Feeling's like you've lost your IC your birthcert your bus pass your name your birthday your identity yadeyade you get the picture. I'm so easily influenced by anything and almost everything around me i can't find myself anymore. (Is there a need?)

I'm starting to find myself a terrible miserable person.

On a sweeter thought, yesterday was REALLY ACCOMPLISHED DAY!
1. finished an unbelievable mountaneous amount of work (reading room+yogurt+classical tunes highly recommended!)
2. did a really accurate personality test C:
3. made 2 new friends C: C:
4. something involving getting dumbly conned by lumpier lou and a fire extinguisher in my bag
5. something involving macs and island creamery and a failed diet

peishi.livejournal is occupied@#!(*#$& How tempted am i. Or did a create a livejournal account and forgot all about it??? Vadavada voo!

Labels: breakaway for a breakthrough

this's bestest birthday bash everrr! to recall: last year's was exactly at sunny hot hot hot sentosa, how happening! of course with carroty carrots and irontwelve HEARTS HEARTS HEARTS but this year's was madness i was rushing all over the world like Katherine Heigl in 27dresses!

in short, (jiaxu 4h non-stop! training breakfast a07 newyorknewyork live band ad1 restless han khym stanley barbeque) you get the picture. HEARTS HEARTS HEARTS! not forgetting team hc these sweethearts (or idiots KIDDING) lied to me that there was training and made me go from queensway to college to ccab back to college again for SURPRISE SURPRISE with monster havaianas that glows in the dark how cute is that!??? spent a lazy afternoon playing animal chess and absolutely nothing productive at all

anyway anyway anyway lumpy emain+lumpier louisa+lumpiest me (how totally untrue) ran the golden mile race on the 1st day of my happy 17! tackkk not exactly the most pipped up day but i just can't put to words the amount of joy i had pounding running with coach pandian DADDY PAPA PAPA PAPA the sports school athletes were really friendly+funny hence i really enjoy wholeheartedly running training racing with them C: but sigh sometimes i really wonder how would things turn outta be like if i had accepted the offer

then was the click!5 concert! I SWEAR BEN ROMANS DID I LOVE YOU TO ME cos ningxin and we were the only maddies hipping around (our wing's rather...dead) but ningxin was kinda lost in her own click5 world/in another click5 dimension she has pretty not much recovered yet ethan kyle joey joe ben ethan kyle ethan kyle kyle ethannn!!!

teeth cleaning training breakfast training lazy long bus rides training lunch training homeworking training red bull training shower training snooze did i mention training!???
i'm feeling nuah. and crispy (i'll miss you so bad)

Labels: for a breakthrough there's no mercy